“Stop Settling

Lesson Scripture:

Psalm 37:4 (ESV) “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

“Love Lessons: Stop Settling”

We believe God for certain areas of our lives but for most of us, finances, healing, and love are difficult areas to completely trust God. Unfortunately, we tend to take these matters into our own hands. Holy Spirit began speaking to me about the area of love to encourage me to hold on and wait for Him. He will give us the desires of our hearts when we delight ourselves in Him first. To delight ourselves in Him means to be happy in Him. Delight (“anag” in Hebrew) means to be glad in anything. See, we want the desires, but we have to be glad in the state we’re currently in. So, when Jehovah connects us with our mates, our happiness isn’t contingent on them and their actions but on our ability to delight ourselves in Jehovah. When we get to the point that we delight ourselves in Jehovah, then we begin to trust Jehovah to give us our hearts’ desires. The closer our relationship with Jehovah, the closer our desires begin to align with His desires for our love lives. When it comes to love, if we don’t get aligned with kingdom marriage principles now, we will continue to connect with people that God didn’t ordain for us. We will continue to experience failed relationships. We will continue to look for love in the wrong places. We will continue to “settle” for ungodly mates.

Holy Spirit gave me a few quotes about relationships dealing with how we’ve been settling in this season.

You are a king, a queen. If they can’t see the royal & godly value in you, then they can’t share the throne with you. Their loss. One of the most important things we must perceive in this season is that we are special to God. He loves us so deeply. If we could only see our worth through the eyes of Yeshua, we would stop settling for people who can’t see our worth. Often times, their perception of us is distorted because of their skewed perception of God and themselves. They can’t see us clearly if they can’t see God clearly. We can’t be so desperate for love that we ignore the signs of their inability to see us through godly lenses. If we can’t commit to, honor, and revere God, where is the power to commit to and honor a “person?” Subject yourself to God first. In James chapter 4, verse 7, the Word says that if we are subject to God, we can resist the devil and he will flee. When we are subject to God, we are in total submission to His will and His Spirit. When our flesh begins to surface, we can clearly hear Holy Spirit speaking to us and guiding us in the way of the Spirit. When we are submitted to God, we are obedient to His Word. When we are subject to God, we honor authority and each other. If I didn’t have Holy Spirit compelling me strongly on the inside, I would have lost it on some people already. It is the power of Holy Spirit on the inside of us that helps us to honor another human being, especially when they aren’t doing right. It is difficult to submit to a person who is operating in their flesh, when we aren’t even submitted to God. That is the true test. Can we submit and honor a person when they are at their worst? Submission is one of the aspects that relationship sustainability requires. Are you totally submitted to God first?

He has been dangling carrots, but no karats – paying a bill, buying groceries, even paying rent but still no ring of commitment. We have stay in dead relationships with no future, no life, no real love, and no commitment for long enough. We are wasting time and delaying our true happiness. Do we trust God for true love? Can we be content in our single state? Women, we will stay in a relationship until the wheels fall off in hopes that mileage will get us the commitment and love we desire. It won’t. The spirits we’re dealing with in a man who won’t commit may vary from person to person such as brokenness, sexual immorality, and narcissism. But if we’re honest, for us to stay in a dead-end relationship indefinitely, we too are dealing with some spirits such as insecurity and dependency. A man who truly loves us and is willing to commit doesn’t dangle carrots – give us things or say things to make us believe he is going to commit. He commits. Get healed. Stop settling.

He has been putting a “wing & thing” on it but has yet to put a ring on it. God created you for more. Don’t settle. Some of us mistake love for a man buying us things or feeding us or sex. The meaning of true love is not based on the world’s standards but in the Word of God. A man finds a wife, not a woman to buy chicken and have sex with. A man finds a wife who is a “good thing.” And then that man finds favor with Jehovah. You’ve been hanging out with a man who is missing his favor because he hasn’t done right by you. You are a good thing, a suitable help make, and an agent for his upgrade.

Stop settling. How long will he halt & limp between two opinions? Either he wants you God’s way or not at all. Don’t settle. A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. Some men say they love you and want to marry you but their actions are noncommittal. Some will even tell us that they are noncommittal and we continue to settle for that ungodly stand he has taken. When they enemy whispers that maybe you’re asking for too much, that is a lie. You are not the one. You’re not asking for much. You’re not asking for anything that God didn’t promise you can have. Let’s put that lie to rest right now. Yes, you a submissive. Yes, you have a quiet spirit. Yes, you will honor your husband. But no, you are not the one who will stay in a relationship with a man who doesn’t know what he wants. You can make excuses and prolong the inevitable by saying you’re a good friend who wants to help him go to the next level… In the end, the answer is still the same. He doesn’t know if you’re the one. He doesn’t know if you’re worthy of being his wife. He doesn’t know if he will marry you. God has someone whose mind is made up about finding you.

Your body is a temple. If he doesn’t take you to the temple, he can’t tamper with your temple. We continue to put ourselves at physical and emotional and spiritual risk by sleeping with men or women who are not our spouses. Jehovah says in Romans 12 for us to present our bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable unto God which is our reasonable service. Only then will we even know His perfect will for our lives. Sex was designed for marriage. And because of our sexual immorality, diseases of all types are continuing to spread. Marriages are continuing to end. We see sex as moments of pleasure but it can cause a lifetime of hurt and consequences when we defile the temple. If you’re not worthy of being his wife, he’s not worthy of defiling your temple, which is the temple of God. Don’t settle. Don’t sin.

If she wants you to compromise your standards now, she will want you to do it again. Take a stand. Don’t settle.
Men, the Word of God says in Proverbs 18, he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Be led by Holy Spirit about the woman you “find.” What are the characteristics of a “wife” according to the Word of God. Is she subject to God? Is her life aligned with the principles of the Word of God? Are you equally yoked? As the head of the household and the head of your wife, you need someone who will complement you and be an asset for you. She needs to be one who will promote your vision. She has to have an uncompromising spirit, unwilling to go against the Spirit of God. Your wife won’t ask you to compromise. Don’t settle.

Number one is not sufficient. God created you to be the only one. You know if you’re just one in the number. Stop settling. When God created Adam, he said it isn’t good for man to be alone. Then, he created Eve, a suitable helpmate. God’s intentions form the beginning were for a man to be with one woman. As I reflect on my studies, I think the first mention of a man with more than one wife was Lamech, after the fall of man. In the world in which we live, it has become the “norm” for us to operate out of order, misaligned with the Word of God. We have become accepting of being someone’s number or three or four person. The devil is a liar. That is not how God intended for relationships to be and we shouldn’t settle for that.

“Being a man’s second, third, or even fourth option is only cute for as long as we can pretend we are okay with it. Ladies, God didn’t create us to be okay with that. Feelings are deceptive. So that empowerment we think we feel as a result of being involved with someone who belongs to someone else is really pride and selfishness. That statement we make—I can’t help if she doesn’t satisfy him and he has to come to me”—is only cute in the flesh and for a moment. After a few months of being number two, three, or four, it isn’t cute any more. It really hurts when we’re all alone and our bodies aren’t enough to keep those men with us. It isn’t cute when we’re reaping all the pain we’ve sown. God has a number-one position reserved just for me and you. He wants us to start bearing the fruit of the Spirit (such as self-control) and stop producing fruits of discord, dissension, and sexual immorality. Let’s stop pretending we’re cool with being less than a man’s only one. If we would only trust God, each of us could have a spot of our own.”

Excerpt From: Dr. Jené “Dr. J.” Elaine Walker. “Meditations for a Surrendered Life.”

You are worthy of real (which shouldn’t be relative) love. Don’t settle. God says there’s more for you than that.
It doesn’t matter if you have a disease, been molested, raped, or a victim of incest, you are worthy of love. Yeshua loves us in spite of everything we’ve done and anything that has happened to us. He wants us to experience unconditional 1 Corinthians 13 love from our mates too. When you begin to realize your worth in Yeshua, you will wait on someone who sees your worth and who is willing to give you real love. Don’t settle.

“A House Brimming with Wealth” by Dr. Jené Walker

Psalm‬ ‭112:1-3 MSG‬‬ “Hallelujah! Blessed man, blessed woman, who fear GOD, Who cherish and relish his commandments, Their children robust on the earth, And the homes of the upright—how blessed! Their houses brim with wealth And a generosity that never runs dry.”
Begin to call yourself, your spouse (your spouse on the way), your children, and your family blessed. Confess the blessing over your life aloud every day and every night. Increase is due to you because you fear Jehovah and obey His commandments. Your house is brimming over with wealth and a generosity that never runs dry… That’s what the Word says. The enemy has deceived and manipulated the church so much so that when money or increase or prosperity or wealth are mentioned in most churches, we think those words are dirty words. We even cringe, roll our eyes, or worse, walk out and leave. When your heart is pure, when you use your wealth to bless the poor and advance the kingdom, when you don’t worship God and mammon in your heart, and when you don’t have a love for money, then wealth, riches, prosperity, and money are a blessing. Some of us have embraced a poverty mentality because we think it is “the right thing for believers to do.” I don’t receive that in my spirit. Renounce that false sense of humility. Renounce those lies and tricks. Stop allowing the enemy to manipulate you and use others to oppress you with that “the body of Yeshua can’t have money” mess. Holy Spirit will keep us rooted. Holy Spirit will convict us if we get off track. Holy Spirit will show us the motives of our hearts so that we can remain pure. Holy Spirit will keep us from greed and duplicity. Holy Spirit will guide us on how to use our wealth for the kingdom. We have kingdom businesses to develop. We have mountains of influence to infiltrate and overtake. We have the poor to see about. We have schools to build. We have prison ministry to facilitate. We have mission fields to conquer. We have to preach the gospel to the ends of the earth. We have to prepare the kingdom for the return of Yeshua. 
 
I believe I’m blessed to be a blessing to the kingdom. I am blessed through my relationship with Yeshua. I’m blessed because my heart is pure. I’m blessed because even though I sin and I’m flawed, I’m walking in obedience. When I’m blessed you’re blessed because my generosity never runs dry. When you’re blessed, I’m blessed. We cherish and relish His commandments so our houses overflow with wealth. We are so blessed that we never run out of blessings to give. I receive the blessings in my spirit and not the curses.  

“‘Radio Show and Blog Guest: Spiritual Warfare Strategies” by Dr. Jené Walker (Hosts Evangelist Shantelle Mosby and Crystal Flanagan)

Audio: Praise Thru the Airwaze Radio Interview with Evangelist Shantelle (Shea) Mosby of V107.5 Radio– Please Click Here to Listen

Blog Interview with Jené Walker (JW) by Crystal Flanagan (CF) of Fruitful Concepts
The decision to give one’s life to Christ is one that is exhilarating, joyful and full of hope with the desire to embrace and serve God on a higher dimension. However, with the acceptance of the Christian faith comes many challenges and attacks from the Enemy not only within the natural but spiritual realm as well. In her new book, Dr. Jené Elaine Walker discusses how readers can better equip themselves against the enemy’s attacks in, Meditations for a Surrendered Life: Winning Daily Spiritual Battles against the Enemy.

CF: At what point did you realize and accept God’s assignment to write your new book, Meditations for a Surrendered Life: Winning Daily Spiritual Battles against the Enemy?
JW: Both the realization and the acceptance of God’s assignment to write my new book manifested gradually. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, I have been ministering through social media for at least the last three years and became a licensed minister as of January of 2016. As a result, God’s people have been blessed by the Word God has given me. God used so many of my “friends” in social media to plant the seed about my writing the book. One Facebook friend suggested that I would write a book, a manual of sorts, for ministers. Others weren’t as specific as they encouraged me saying, “I can’t wait to read your book” or “I wish I could go back and review your posts because they really bless me.” Then finally, approximately two years ago, a woman with whom I’m now really close called me after 10:00 pm. I answered, somewhat perplexed about why she was calling so late. When I answered, she said, “I just want to be obedient to the Holy Spirit’s leading.” She said, “I believe you have some books God is going to birth in you.” Well, then I was fully alert and she had my attention. She continued, “God gave me a vision of you. You were seated at a table and there was a line wrapped around a huge building. People were waiting for you to autograph their book.” When she said that, I leaped out of my bed and immediately began praising God.

Although several others had planted seeds before her about my book, it was that prophetic word from this lady that caused me to accept and actually complete God’s assignment to write this book. Through total surrender of my life to God and walking in obedience to His instructions, I was able to hear God more clearly when He would speak to me. Through total surrender to God, I was able to relinquish any preconceived fleshly thoughts I had about the book and how the book was to be organized. God later revealed that for my first book, I would compile my writings and quotes and organize them into themes or categories of meditations that will help His people during their moment by moment struggles each day.

CF: You discuss the importance of being equipped to fight the spiritual battle? How important is it for Christians to be in communion with Christ on a daily basis?
JW: Chapter 3 is entitled, “Communion with God.” Communion in this chapter refers to “our” daily communication with Him, our desire for Him to be with us, and our obedience to His promptings through the Holy Spirit. When you are in communion with God, you are able to hear the Holy Spirit when He gives you instructions because you read God’s Word daily.” Reading God’s Word daily builds spiritual capacity for God to speak to us through His Word. I have received the answers to many of my questions about life, love, relationships, and next steps for my life through God’s Word. I have especially learned about spiritual warfare and engaging the Enemy through His Word, which is my defensive weapon. God speaks to me through His Word; He teaches me how to fight using His Word.

In addition to the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, another very important piece of armor for me and I think all believers is prayer in the spirit without ceasing – for yourself and others. Prayer is another means for us to communicate with God. Being still and listening for God’s response after prayer is another opportunity for God to speak to us. I need to hear from God about how He wants me to handle every situation in my life. I’ve already done life my way. Now, I have to hear from God before I move.

I had to stay in God’s Word and pray and fast to be delivered from the spirit of rejection. The spirit was strong and on me since childhood. It caused me to have low self-worth. That is spiritual warfare. That is a spiritual battle. In order to be equipped for battle and to win daily spiritual battles, believers must employ all the spiritual armor of God. Every piece of armor that Paul identifies in Ephesians chapter 6, requires us to be in daily moment-by-moment communion with God.

CF: Your book stresses the importance of living a “surrendered” life. How vital is it for Christians to surrender to God?
JW: When I think of my story and ultimately who I am, I can sum it up in a few words, “I am totally surrendered to God – finally.” Before I clearly began to hear from God, my life was so noisy and cluttered. I tried doing everything on my own and in my own strength. I tried to manage my son, my job, my money, my relationships, and my life my way. It wasn’t that I wasn’t in relationship with God. I’ve always been an avid Bible reader, Sunday School and Bible study attendee, and one who fasts regularly. But what God revealed to me is we can do all those things “religiously” and still may not have submitted our entire lives to Him. He told me to surrender. (Please understand that surrendering is a daily process or at least it is for me.) And the things of the world to which I held on began to fall off as I surrendered them to God. I remember when God told me that I was still holding on to worldly things. I asked God, “Well what else do I need to release? I’ve given up ungodly relationships and so many other things. He clearly said to me, “You’ve given up so many things? My Word says for you to present your body as a living sacrifice, Holy and acceptable unto Me. That is your reasonable sacrifice.” Jesus showed me that although I had physically given up some things, that my heart was still going astray. Surrendering isn’t just the act of giving up things while yet still longing for those things or being disgruntled because you gave them up. Surrendering is also the transformation of the heart. Yield your desires to still hold on to the word to God.

I was doing warfare in my house one evening and Holy Spirit said, “Pick up that book off the floor.” I looked down and it was a book entitled Pigs in the Parlor. I opened it up to a page that explained the most common symptoms of indwelling demons. God immediately takes my eyes to “Religious Error.” Hammond explains that involvement to any degree in religious error can open the door for demons. As I scratched my head, The Holy Spirit says read on. Hammond further explained that objects and literature from sources of religious error have been known to attract demons in houses. Well Hammond was specifically referencing, false religions, cults, the occult, and false doctrine; however, the Holy Spirit was leading me to my bookshelf. I went in my study and saw an extensive collection of African American fiction that is borderline erotica. Jesus said to me, “Totally surrender.” Needless to say, my son and I (whom I had exposed to this filth) took every book off the shelf.

What does it profit me to gain the whole world and lose my soul? Ask yourself that question. How long will Christians halt and limp between two opinions. If God is God, serve God totally. But if the devil is god in your life, serve him totally. God hates a lukewarm church so we must die to flesh and totally surrender ourselves to Him. I had to go “all in.”

CF: At what point, in your opinion, and spiritual discernment, do you believe that Christians either lose or win against the Enemy’s attacks?  
JW: The point at which we walk in the flesh and war after the flesh is the point at which we lose spiritual battles. Paul clearly states in Ephesians chapter 6 that we don’t wrestle against flesh and blood but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. We focus so much on “people” and situations that we fail to recognize that there is an invisible battle. The devil and demonic powers are at work in the world all day. Demons laugh at flesh fights among humans; principalities smile at rallies for racial justice; rulers of darkness think that “movements” for rights are hilarious. But at the name of Jesus, powers of the air tremble; they get anxious and uncomfortable.

God’s Word has power. The Holy Spirit empowers us to tread on serpents and scorpions and over all the power of the devil but we lose if we don’t use our authority. Stop focusing on the person being used by the devil and fight to win. To fight with your flesh when God has told us to use spiritual weapons, is to fight a losing battle. Pray, fast, study and use the Word of God in your defense, have faith, walk in righteousness, keep the peace of God, wear the helmet of salvation and you can’t lose.

CF: How has your faith played an impact in your personal and professional life?
JW: Chapter 4 of my book is entitled “Exercise Your Faith.” As believers, we live each day believing in God’s Word. We don’t have to see the promise; we just know by faith that the promise will be fulfilled. God has done so much in my life time for me, and my son. If I just look back over my life, my faith should increase far beyond mustard seed faith. What I have learned about the impact faith has in my life is the more I believe, the more God will exceed my expectations for me and my son. As I totally surrendered my life to God, my faith increased and my response to warfare improved. My focus has become the heavenly kingdom and not this earthly kingdom. I have set my mind on things above. So, because of my faith, my ministry as a mother, my book, my ministry of preaching and teaching, my ministry with my students at school, and my ministry in church have all become kingdom focused and under one umbrella – kingdom work.

CF: For an unbeliever that may not know about your ministry and is curious about your book, what is the first thing that you would tell them?
JW: The devil isn’t loyal to anyone. The difference between an attack from the devil on a believer and a non-believer is that believers have the victory through Christ Jesus and non-believers lose two times – once now and once and for all eternally. Our Enemy, Satan, has no power or authority over us as believers and his attacks come frequently, but your soul must be saved to win this spiritual war. If you don’t come to Christ now, the kind of suffering that your lord, the devil has you going through right now, will intensify and be eternal. You can see the judgment of God right now throughout the earth – typhoons, contaminated water, floods, fires and the like – but the final judgments will be unbearable.

There is no way to the Father except by Christ. In a world full of darkness, Jesus Christ is our only light. Through Christ, you are protected. Through Christ, you will have eternal life after death. Through Christ, although you will suffer on earth for the kingdom, you will be victorious. Through Jesus Christ, you will inherit the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and a peace that surpasses all understanding. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, you are able to employ spiritual weapons to combat his attacks. Read my book as believers and non-believers alike share in the same kinds of sufferings. The Holy Spirit will use the meditations in this book to change your life. You’ve tried everything else, won’t you let Jesus, the Messiah, our King, the Saviour be your last “try?”

CF: Can you provide more insight on your ministry?
JW: The purpose of the ministry God gave me is to help believers to win daily spiritual battles and to draw unbelievers to Christ and to equip all God’s people for battle through preaching, teaching, writing, and speaking.

CF: What do you hope readers will gain after reading your book?
JW: Meditations for a Surrendered Life: Winning Daily Spiritual Battles against the Enemy provides daily, thought-provoking writings and sayings to help the reader to navigate a world infested with sin and an Enemy on a never-ending prowl for victims. Refer to the book any time to encourage you in your faith and to provide you with instructions for living a surrendered life and for winning daily spiritual battles.

CF: Will there be any additional projects in the near future?
JW: I’m continuously accepting engagements to preach, to facilitate women’s conferences, and to teach at youth conferences. In addition, God has given me the outline for my second book already about the power of positive relationships amongst women. The Holy Spirit has given me a strong presence in social media, including my blog. The Holy Spirit gives me something to say daily. I post focus scriptures almost daily as the Holy Spirit leads me.

To learn more about, Dr. Jené Elaine Walker or to purchase her book, Meditations for a Surrendered Life: Winning Daily Spiritual Battles against the Enemy you can visit her at http://www.meditationsforasurrenderedlife.com/. To access Crystal Flanagan’s Fruitful Concepts Blog, click here.

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“Game Recognizes Game” by Dr. Jené Walker

This is not the season to be deceived. Too much is at stake. The enemy is ramping up his deception game and using even the people of God in his conspiracy against us and the kingdom. He does not want you to give birth this season. But since he can’t abort your purpose, he is sending decoys. Be discerning in this season. Do not be distracted by distractions. The game hasn’t changed. In the same way you recognized game when you were in the world, use your spirit to discern people who are being used to throw you off your spiritual game. We can’t afford to be distracted in this season. If their “yes” isn’t really “yes;” if they don’t show up when they’re supposed to; if you’re struggling to figure them out; if they talk a good game but there’s no follow through, how many more signs do we need? Run! Run away from distractions toward your destiny. We don’t have time for it. We have too much kingdom business this season. Every person sent to you isn’t for you. Be vigilant and be obedient and take off the blinders. Jené Elaine Walker